There's one question that I've been asked over and over again, and whether or not it directly affects you, I'm sure you know someone that it does. Here it is, phrased exactly as it came to me a few days ago from a reader:
What Do Men Really Think About Women Who Are Over the So-Called "Average" Weight Limit?
Bit of a loaded question, but it's a fair one. And of course, the answer does vary greatly depending on the man.
There are a decent chunk of men out there who genuinely aren't interested in a woman unless she's skinny. If I had to guess at how many men hold their potential mates to this standard, I'd say it's around 25-35%.
But that still leaves a lot of truly eligible men, and I think you'd be surprised by how many guys find a girl's completely visible ribcage disgusting. I mean come on, outside of Bugs Bunny cartoons, there's just no reason for that...
And there are a lot of men out there who really do love the bodies of heavier women. Who doesn't like large breasts, for instance? And at the risk of being politically incorrect (and oh, how that terrifies me), I'd bet heavily that any woman who has ever been concerned about what men think of women "over a certain weight" has breasts that at least fill out a C-cup. At least a C-cup. At least.
Do you know what all men love? Big honking breastesises.
When you stop and think about it, breasts are really a lot like snow flakes; If a man ever looked out a window saw breasts of every size, shape, color and nipple variety falling from the sky, don't you just know that man would run outside and start trying to catch them on his tongue?
That last paragraph? That made perfect sense to me.
Just because a woman has some meat on her doesn't mean that she can't get a nice and cute guy. Are there fit men out there who aren't going to want to date a woman who isn't fit? Of course! But let me ask you a question:
If you met two guys who were both really interesting, and both of them really made you feel special when you were with them, and one of them just so happened to be physically fit... Which one would you rather be with?
If you were a man (or at least Tiger Woods), chances are good you'd say "both," but I covered that a few chapters back. The point is that in that scenario, no matter how you answered, it would only matter if both guys were equal in every other sense.
Do you know the single most important factor a man considers when he picks the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with? Her personality. You are more important than how you look! That's a cliche' for a reason, dear. It's very true.
Every woman I've ever loved, I loved because she made me feel special. Because being with her made me feel like I was loved, and that my life was better simply because she was there. Isn't that true for you, too?
The bottom line is that the way men feel about heavier women tends to mirror the way women feel about heavier men. Of course a fit woman is always going to be attractive to a man, but that doesn't mean that your pant size is going to really matter to the man that you want to be with.
Every time I've ever fallen in love, it started when I met a girl with pretty eyes who managed to say something that took me off guard. I wanted to learn more about her, so I sought her out for conversations. I'm a man, and when I fall in love, it's because of who she is, not because of what she looks like.
That said, do you know what else I love? Big honking breastesises.
To wrap it up: Yes, all things being equal, most guys would rather be with a thin woman. But what you should take away from that if you're not a thin woman is not that you're doomed to be alone; It's that you shouldn't let all other things be equal.
Of all the reasons to want to lose weight, what men think of you should be at the bottom of the list.
Copyright Josh Johnson, All Rights Reserved
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